And it’s actually a huge relief

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I used to spend a lot of time worrying about how other people judged me.

What I wore, was it appropriate, did it fit right? Did I say too much? Did I say too little? This person must think I’m too intense. …

You don’t have to know all the perfect answers before you start

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I have a new consulting client. Well, one that I’ve worked with before. I enjoy working with the management team. And its a project like many others that I have done in the past.

My first deadline is a few weeks away. Plenty of time. But I know that I…

It’s not always easy, but it works

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I spent about two hours the other day convinced my entire family was about to die.

You see, in recent years I have developed an unfortunate driving phobia.

The summer between college and graduate school, a friend and I drove across country for a few months. We cruised along dusty…

Because sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference

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A close friend’s stepson spent all summer desperate for a pandemic puppy.

Because I am such a dog person, I became Jake’s go-to on the topic. He researched nearby breeders and was constantly sending me adorable pictures. …

If we are ever going to make it through the pandemic

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I have always been an anxious person, in one form or another.

In graduate school, I remember laying flat on the floor of the second year students’ shared office space. Staring up at the pockmarked ceiling tiles and wrapped around the overflowing trash cans. I was at the peak of…

Studies show what really works

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My mind would not stop talking to me this afternoon.

You see, I ordered a multi-tiered plant stand for my office a few weeks ago. If you’re like me, video calls have become a staple in your work life. And in a moment of inspiration (insanity?), …

Stop regretting the bumps in the road

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It’s cold and snowy here in Colorado this time of year, so I spend a lot of the weekend hiking along wintry trails.

I duck under thick green Douglas Fir branches and pass papery white Aspen trunks. Walk along the edges of steep ravines and over narrow bridges that cross…

Otherwise it will choose problems that can’t be solved

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I was trying hard not to lose my sh*t this morning.

It takes a lot for me to lose my cool at this stage of my life. I have a lot of good mental tools that I use to shift perspective when the unexpected happens. …

You have to plan to let your mind wander

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Last week was a whopper for me.

It was a convergence of events. My kids’ school year was ending, and we had a lot of unusual events (and a lot of emotions) to manage around that. Plus, I had several different groups of family members in town and staying with…

Here’s how to focus on the things that you actually can control

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I have struggled with the need for control for most of my life.

For a long time, I felt like my life was out of control, out of my hands. Every day, it felt like things happened to me that I didn’t expect or didn’t want. And that filled me…

Deb Knobelman, PhD

Neuroscience. Wall Street. C-Suite. Parent. Recovering Nervous Nelly.

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