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I Believe in Participation Trophies
Trying is hard
Yesterday was my son’s last day of school. It was his first year at a school for kids with Learning Differences. The end of the year ceremony was very meaningful. The teacher took about 30 seconds to talk about every single child in her class. To mention his or her strengths, and let that child feel special. They each got an award that was tailored to them. None of these awards included things like “most advanced reader” or “best math grades.”
These kids bust their butts trying to read at grade level (if they are dyslexic), or stay focused in class. They fall down over and over, and have the courage to get back up again, even if the end result isn’t perfection. Why shouldn’t they get awards that acknowledge their efforts?
I grew up obsessed with being a “winner”
I didn’t always feel this way. I was born with a driving ambition. I thrived on competition for almost my entire life. In my mind, I thought — how would I know that I was doing well unless I was better than someone else?
That attitude got me pretty far in the external world. I went to a top college, got a PhD from an Ivy League school, worked at several prestigious firms. But inside, I was a mess. I was never good enough in my own mind. I had to keep pushing, I had to be…